recap.

RECAP..

oh well i did quite a bit of catching up with a couple of friends.
well i met up with tiffany, and we chilled over at coffee club and started looking at people..
tiz was there too.!


then i met up with iris, lyn and seng the next day. felt really good about it haha! and its been a LONG time too. we had swensens and well what can i say? iris have been CRAPPING ME SHIT! hahha LOVE THIS BABE..



its been a while girl



and seng, with his earring



and babe again (=






and just on friday, i met jack. had dinner with his family... oooooo i just cant wait for his sis to deliver!!! so looking forward to that.. arghhh ok we went to tamon, a really good japanese restaurant. like one bento cost close to $30?? haha and a simple one too..



TAMON











well i didnt snap pictures, so i just grabbed some from esle where




then after, bala joined and we headed to highlander and drank up loads, next to shiraz, had more beer and sisha! OH OH OH there were belly dancers too! TOTALLY AWESOME! i swear jack had got his eyes stuck on them!! and the following day HE WANTED TO HEAD BACK THERE BADLY.. but... we didnt. HAHA
instead mai, bala, jacky and myself checked out MAMAS CARRIBEAN.. wasnt exactly GOOD as i thought. but stil not bad...



MAMAS



and last night, met up with sai and rayner, dined at joe's corner had fish and chips and sai had grilled salmon. we SINFULLY binged on cakes and ice-cream too! damn.... had a couple of pounds on alrdy. shitloads.

mug

mug.

now, i really need to START MUGGING. but i just cant seem to getting along with it.
theres a weird kind of repulsion. nonetheless, IM GOING TO DO IT.
by hook or by crook (:

prove to me u're REAL

why is this so?


why is it that im feeling this way? why is it that i cant put my finger to what im exactly feeling? and this is just so taxing of my energy. i cant point out my unhappiness because i dont even know how to say it. WHY??? why am i feeling this way? how come things are falling apart within me again? why am i feeling all so depressed out of the sudden? i dont know, i really dont know

i feel as if im at a crossroad.



after the conversations i had with my friend recently made me feel this way, that life's a bitch. he puts me down just like a snap. im always being expected to be like how others want me to, then it keeps me wondering when can i really be myself? when would someone put themself in my shoes? and when would someone really understands how i feel? hey dude, the things you say to me all these while has hurt me all the time. and whenever i try to share how i feel to you, it leads to nowhere. i feel upset of the way im feeling about our friendship, you might not know that you're actually pushing me away. and til one point of time, i will really go. we all have different personalities and characters, why want to force me into something else? not literally FORCE, but the words u used and the things u relate to me about just makes me feel that the conversation will always be stagnant. yes prolly u didnt say that im in the wrong. and whenever i say something, you'll always have your 101 reasons or statements to back you up. its hard, its really hard, i've tried to understand and change myself, but then when things dont get resolved, it makes me think to myself "why must i be someone else? and when can i BE myself?" no one would prolly be able to tell me this, because this situation is hard to fix. just so hard.


problem 3 is over too and which school would be from 8am-6pm BUT thankfully, anyway, btc project is finally over, crmaaron's plw tutorials are done! its just makes me feel a load lighter. today was quite a easy-going day, though its a wednesdaybtc and plw lectures were cancelled. that explains why. headed to al-ameen with kandace, atikah, serious and wayne. and i felt good hanging out with them, though sometimes i feel odd and i dont know why.



our BTC roof model



wayne getting cranky



atikah trying to be funny



karwah, OMG no comments



anyway this is a complementary pic of maipig and i (x



sighh, where are you? i've been waiting to talk to you the whole day, but where were you? till, now you haven called me. is this real??? is what we are having REAL? are you who you are? thats the confusion im having within me. please dont let me think the other way round, be like how u've portray urself to me please. i miss you. ):

electricfying

& it has been electrifying


oh hello once again, im back after afew days of MIA-ing. few days have past and im still in the same old situation waiting for the same old damn thing to end. its pretty funny at times, why things always turns out to be how u've never expected it to? and it just keeps you wondering why. yea pretty weird but thats just part and parcel of life isnt it?

friendship to me seems to have taken on a different perspective and still to no avail of perfect and most accurate answers, it leaves me blank and at lost. why is it that the GOOD TIMES only last for that lil short period and that after awhile, it ALL leads back to square one again. and thats just so dispiriting, you'll just find yourself lingering in and out of different situations. just how to make myself feel better and to solve it would be so destressing, and yet again who would know? and who would understand? dont bother telling me " i do understand, and i've been thru shit like you are now? well the fact is you dont, u've never been thru this SHIT.

another thing is, "you" i really dont know when you would actually start to heed my advices and change your mindset, it hurts me to see you behaving this way it also pains me to know whats your intentions are. we all know that this will never bring you far but once again, you're just living in your own world and self-denying. it really breaks my heart to know that, and i cant take it no more, YET again and again u'll be doing this and saying all this fucking crap. WHEN WOULD YOU ACTUALLY START UNDERSTANDING ALL THE FUCK I SAY??? WHEN WHEN WHEN? what do you even regard me as??? if i even mean a thing to you, why not listen?? WHY NOT? im harmless with my opinions and advices!!!!!!!! stop behaving like a fuck shit, if i dont care for you i wouldn't even be gaving a FLYING FUCK about you. DUMBASS!! wake up your FUCKING idea would you??? IT IS absoFUCKINGlutely DESTRESSING. you know?? you dont FUCKING know a single bit.

well anyway i went to sam's place for dinner, i waited for her lessons to end and took a bus together and her mum cooked asam pedas! delicious~~~ BUT her mum made me SO MALU, kept being such a good host and all, AND when i wanted to help with the dishes and brought the plates back to the kitchen she called me GATAL!! hahahaha then still make tea with pandan leaves and it was aromatic! NICE! kept me going for a few cups and with keropok and it is STILL DELICIOUS. so aunty if you are actually reading this post, or sam if u're reading this convey this: " AUNTY YOUR COOKING IS SUPERB! and i LOVE IT. (((: <333"



i kept wondering why our faces were red haha!



FAT FAT FAT me



still FAT FAT FAT haha



SAW THAT?? WTF